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the Turning

Posted: Mon, 7th Jul 2008, 2:16pm

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Zephlon

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Are we conscious of the examples that we unintentionally share with the ones we care for most? Do we fully comprehend how it may affect them? And in the end, can we foresee where it will take them in the future? For the Turning point within our lives is tremendously affected by little things.

Camera: Canon Gl2


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Posted: Tue, 8th Jul 2008, 1:39am

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Bucees

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really cool bro! great message aswell... theres so many things that i have said and done that i want to go back and punch my self in the face for! good job man!
Posted: Tue, 8th Jul 2008, 5:49pm

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Ahnkniel

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Of all the films I've seen so far on this site I think this has to be one of the best. It wasn' the lighting or the action or the effects, it was story and dialogue plain and simple. The message of this is so powerful and so completely well done, you should feel extremely proud of yourselves for pulling this off. Congratulations, if I were you I would take this to every film festival I could Its That Good.


Great work.
Posted: Tue, 8th Jul 2008, 8:30pm

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Atom

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I generally agree with what's been said. This is up there with the top-par movies on the site. What I like more, is that you seem to have taken all the previous criticism and critique and built-upon it into a nice, finely-tuned piece of work. Great job!

While the acting is spotty (unavoidably, I'm sure) in some places, the excellent lighting, technicals, and overall direction make this message effective and the work top-notch.

An easy 4/5 from me, but a 5/5 for the effectiveness-of-message and commendable subject-matter you were willing to take on and not make cheesy or melodramatic. Quite a feat indeed. Where this falls back into very, very strong 4/5 territory is with two things.

And these are my only gripes. If I really had some, these would be the text and the music. The stark blue color temperature to the text against the black background is a jarring change from the golden and desolate but warmer orange, white, and red tones and set pieces throughout the movie. To be entirely cohesive, I would suggest altering the font color slightly.

The music, while fitting, I assume is copyrighted. In fact, it stood out to me as the American Beauty soundtrack, markedly. That isn't good, and it pains me to see it in this. Because (and I could be wrong, this could be sound-alike royalty free music and if so I apologize) with such standout production values everywhere else, your work is cheapened by music that isn't yours when you probably could've found something equally-effective that's royalty-free or have someone like Sean Beeson, Sid Barhhoorn, or Tommy Gundersen compose for you. (all of which are and would've been excellent choices for 'The Turning')

The other problem with copyrighted music, conscience aside, is that people can sometimes recognize where it's from. Now is this case. I recognize it's American Beauty, and therefore it's hard for me to see this as it's own, original piece of work. The same fate doomed 'Faded' for me with the Batman Begins soundtrack.

You're such a talented guy, Zephlon, it kills me to see you using these obvious soundtracks! smile

(And don't put "Budget: Zero", man. That sounds all kinds of stupid and cocky that isn't you. It may look impressive to work on a zero-budget to some other guys; but here where we're all working on one it truly doesn't mean that much. It just looks silly to me. smile)
Posted: Tue, 8th Jul 2008, 9:28pm

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David Dixon

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Great video. Simplistic, just excelent. What program was used for the last shot,the company title shot. I think it was CCv or somthing like that. anyway good job.
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 1:49am

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Zephlon

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thanks for the comments.

Atom - great comment only one thing...the soundtrack is "Shawshank Redemption" not "American Beauty" but they are both composed by Thomas Newman. I only recently found out about Sean Beason and Tommy Gundersen and from now on will be pushing for non copy righted music, and I strongly agree with you that recognizing a soundtrack ruins the movie for you.

Note: I will remove the "zero budget", just for you. The contest I made the movie for had some very...childish videos...so I really needed to emphasis that we are not pro's at this. But I just copied the text i made from that site.

FXhomer39446 - (change your name biggrin ) The Company logo at the end of the credits was made in Compositelabs. The was logo made in Photoshop and then I added a light gleam composite for the beginning, and did a wavy distort for the lower text.

Ahnkniel - thanks, I have put it in the few film festivals that I have found, the question is if they except me. smile
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 5:15am

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Atom

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Zephlon wrote:

thanks for the comments.

Atom - great comment only one thing...the soundtrack is "Shawshank Redemption" not "American Beauty" but they are both composed by Thomas Newman
Bah! I sound so stupid! I was listening to the American Beauty soundtrack while I was writing that post and I guess I completely mixed them up in the writing (Although you're right, they're both Thomas Newman). Of course I meant Shawshank, it's my favorite and most-watched movie! smile It too is highly-recognizeable, although clearly not as noticeable as some mainstream John Williams work like Indy or Star Wars or Jaws. I'd still watch it, though I'm sure you're getting there with the music.
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 1:40pm

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Simon K Jones

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Generally well made, and I particularly liked the way the parents' argument was held entirely off-camera, while we focused on the son.

Unfortunately it didn't quite work for me overall as it felt far too simplified for such an important subject. The 'we all teach' titles were a little unnecessary, too, hammering the point home far too strongly. It felt more like 'we all preach'. razz

Some of the dialogue felt like it was too hard-hitting, and didn't really scale convincingly. To go from 'hello' to 'whore' to a punch in such a short time just didn't seem to ring true for me.

You're definitely to be commended for tackling a tricky subject, but I think more subtlety and a less simplistic payoff would have made it more effective.
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 8:15pm

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Mellifluous

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Rating: +1

My feelings are similar to Tarn's. But first, the positives.

On the whole, good cinematography. I especially liked the dark profile shot of the protagonist watching the car drive off. Some nice camera movement, although the school shots seemed to lack focus on the protagonist, the shots weren't well composed. You had a nice tracking pan from right to left, from wall to school lobby, but the shot didn't end with the character in shot which made it redundant. Nice shot, but sandwiched in and as a result doesn't work for me.

Good sound. The music was a little manipulative but the dialogue was crystal clear and the wifebeating sound was effective.

I too didn't like the titles. Do you see a movie at the cinema cut off mid flow for the director to point out in titles that this is a key point in the film? No. A film's message should speak for itself and it weakens yours to do this. I would have cut straight from hitting the girl to entering the house again, and it would have been fine.

A good message though and though simplistic there's lots of good things here.

Edit: I understand Tarn's point about getting to "whore" and then punching too quickly, but often this is how kids emotionally disturbed by parents fighting behave. But you do need to think about character development at every single moment of a script/film and ask yourself whether certain things are too quick etc and leave enough of a trail of A leading to B, unless it's on purpose.
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 9:08pm

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0 0 0TheDirector0 0 0

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I have a couple questions to ask. First, what editing software did you use, cause I know it's not Windows Movie Maker. Second, what did you use to make the poster, I like it a lot.

Good movie, I really think you have the potential to make a huge motion picture. This movie had very good lighting. It is a perfect example that you dont need to have explosions and lazers to make a movie good.
Posted: Wed, 9th Jul 2008, 9:23pm

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miker

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Hrm well, this was a decent short film. The idea behind it is pretty basic. When reading the film description, I was hoping for something that would impact me deeply.. and make me think otherwise the way I would normally. But that simply wasn't the case, unfortunately. I enjoyed this though. The cinematography was really good for the most part. I'm impressed that you shot this at your school as well. The argument in the beginning, between the parents, didn't seem aggressive enough to impact me as a viewer the way I wanted it to. I felt it was lacking. The acting seemed forced and a little weak. I also thought the text was a little unnecessary (especially the text half way in to the short). I think we all understood the idea without the text.. and it just seemed to really force itself upon the audience too hard (especially because the idea behind it really isn't very deep IMO).

I think I know what you were aiming for with this project, and it was a good attempt.

3/5 from me.
Posted: Thu, 10th Jul 2008, 2:15am

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Zephlon

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Hey thanks for the comments guys, they all help alot.

To clear some things up. I personally am not pleased with the timing either, but this short was made for a contest so I had some things to keep in mind. First of all the rules stated that the movie could not be longer 2 minutes. Obviously we raped the 2 minute mark, but I got permission to submit it anyways. Since I was still limited by time we cut out a lot of in between stuff, a lot of the argument, and other parts that helped to develop the characters.

The titles... I personally believe in letting the audience make their own opinions as to what the video is about. But again for the contest it was required to have text as a summary. They state that you need to make a PSA with descriptive titles in the video sad

Tarn - thanks for the comment about the argument off camera, I thought it helped the audience to put their own parents in the picture, that way it was slightly more impacting. I'm glade someone noticed it

0 0 0TheDirector0 0 0 - I edited the video in Adobe Premiere Pro CS3. The poster is just a picture I took on the last day of the shoot, then I added some grain and contrast in Adobe Photoshop.
Posted: Thu, 10th Jul 2008, 8:01am

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Simon K Jones

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Zephlon wrote:

Tarn - thanks for the comment about the argument off camera, I thought it helped the audience to put their own parents in the picture, that way it was slightly more impacting. I'm glade someone noticed it
Interesting, it was definitely a good idea! Also, a scene like that would be very difficult to film/act convincingly on such a tight schedule/budget, so it was a very sly creative call.

Thanks for explaining some of the film's other quirks. Presuming you've got the rest of the footage still, have you considered maybe doing a "director's cut" with the titles removed and a longer running time?
Posted: Fri, 11th Jul 2008, 6:29am

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JasonX1024

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HONESTLY. This is professional to college work. This is astounding, the acting...magnificent. The DOF was very good, and the fast motion and rewind features were quite detailed. The message is broadcasted thouroughly and it has a decent moral. This is very interesting and oh yeah. Nice green vibrator by your bed.
Posted: Wed, 16th Jul 2008, 2:33pm

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drspin98

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Refreshing to see a decent message instead of another crappy movie with middle-class white kids acting like "ganstas" or hitmen with white tennies.

Great use of music. Loved the shot of the car pulling out.

Nice.
Posted: Thu, 17th Jul 2008, 5:33am

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Zephlon

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Thanks guys.

drspin98 - "another crappy movie with middle-class white kids acting like 'ganstas' " ....by chance are you referring to my other movie "Faded"?

Tarn - Directors Cut would be nice...but the problem is, early during filming we realized we had to cut down the argument dialogue, so we have a lot of it filmed, but the dialogue is not 100% complete...and my Actor is no longer here sad

JasonX1024 - "Nice green vibrator by your bed" ...haha... my friend had that in his room, we had no clue what it was, but we made sure it was in the shot biggrin
Posted: Thu, 17th Jul 2008, 12:09pm

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drspin98

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I am not referring to any specific film on here-I couldn't because I can't remember any of the names of the films I refer to, I just know that there seems to be a whole lot of them out there. As far as yours-I don't believe I've ever seen it-or if I did, I don't remember.
If you send me a link I'd love to check it out and let you know.
Posted: Fri, 25th Jul 2008, 1:05pm

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Fuel99

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This is one of the best serious movies I've seen in a while on Fxhome. The plot is not exactly clear, but the message is very well defined. Good job.
Posted: Fri, 25th Jul 2008, 1:17pm

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Sam Larsen

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awsome video
Posted: Fri, 25th Jul 2008, 11:06pm

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Zephlon

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UPDATE: I said this video was made for a contest back in March and today we just heard who the winners are in the contest. We weren't the top 5, but they created a new category titled "Most Powerful Video" just for us smile We Won $300, which isn't much, but hey its better than nothing.

You can check out the Top 5 winners at the GREAT MINDS FOUNDATION website (just watch the video on the homepage for the winners).

Again thank you all for you comments and critiques.
Posted: Sun, 27th Jul 2008, 5:31am

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nothingwithoutChrist

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Absolutely great! smile
Posted: Tue, 29th Jul 2008, 6:42pm

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RafaLL

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:0 Great Minds Foundation has been hacked x)
Posted: Thu, 31st Jul 2008, 2:31pm

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TSHADproductions

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Fantastic. Best I have seen yet (at least for a non-war movie)!
Posted: Mon, 13th Oct 2008, 2:09pm

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CBeast

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I like your music, and how you use it!
Did you buy the songĀ“s licenses or did you produce it by yourself?
Posted: Mon, 13th Oct 2008, 2:11pm

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Atom

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Neither. He just used existing, copyrighted tracks from The Shawshank Redemption Soundtrack. That is, perhaps, the one downfall of this movie