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The Dead Deal

Posted: Tue, 19th Aug 2008, 4:14pm

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Anarchy Films

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Rating: -3

A short film by K&Z Productions, depicting the results of a deal gone sour, between a professional hitman who chooses the wrong house.

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Posted: Thu, 21st Aug 2008, 6:22am

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Zephlon

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Rating: +1

For starters watch the language buddy. Cursing can be used to be impacting, when used correctly. But when you use it for 80% of your dialog cursing really does nothing more than make you look like you are trying to hard to be "Grown up". Personally I think cursing is quite dumb and as Mark Twain put it "Cursing is the attempt of a feeble mind trying to express itself forcefully."

Besides that, your angles where quite nice. You kept it visually interesting by switching angles a lot. As for your action there is a lot left to be desired. First when Man1 runs back towards his truck after picking up the shotgun you should have had Man2 fire at him. Really who is going to sit there and watch a guy run away with a shotgun?

The biggest thing that annoyed me besides the pointless swearing was the way you handled your weapons. You held the Pump action shotgun by the clip? Thats not very effective for cocking a gun and really just not believable at all. Then when you held the pistol you held your thumbs up BEHIND the slide? If you really fired a gun like that, the slide being forced back would destroy your thumbs.

What I'm getting is in you next film think about things in real life situation and film the movie like that. If this was real you would have shot the guy as soon as he reached for the shotgun, so then in the movie shoot at the guy (hit his leg or something). Don't take this as a negative review. The effects weren't bad, the grading was pretty good, and you had a PLOT, your already ahead of the game. Just think about the situation as you make your movie, realism helps the audience to get "lost" in your film...and back off a little on the swearing.
Posted: Fri, 22nd Aug 2008, 9:35pm

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Anarchy Films

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Rating: -8

ok jesus christ, you don't have to babbel me to death!
Posted: Fri, 22nd Aug 2008, 9:36pm

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Anarchy Films

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Rating: -9

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
Posted: Fri, 22nd Aug 2008, 9:50pm

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B3N

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Hi...have I come at a bad time?

Even so, yeah I agree with Zephlon. Sure this may have been a bit of fun, but "fun" things really should be on places like Youtube if you don't want professional and helpful opinions.

I'm sick and tired of saying and seeing people on here trying to help someone without the creator getting all arsey because we can see the things they can't. I'm afraid that's how the world works kid. Get used to it.

Here comes the helpful part so you cna skip it if you don't want to bother with improving your talent

Overall it wasn't too bad but a lot of improvement needed around the acting and realism side of things. Camerawork was pretty decent though so well done on that. I think it's time for you to get onto those training wheels and learn and progress.

As for the cursing. Yeah...they aren't worth having in there, people in reality don't curse constantly like those silly games make out. But I would suggest making something that was at least below a 15+ movie. I mean.

Helpful parts are over, whoo, about time eh?

But yes, I agree with what Zephlon said.

Look forward to the upcoming films. And please try using a different attitude, because your one right now pretty much sucks balls.
Posted: Fri, 22nd Aug 2008, 10:28pm

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Bolbi

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The bi-polar express just came into the station
Posted: Sat, 23rd Aug 2008, 12:57am

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Penguin

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FXhomer11107 wrote:

ok jesus christ, you don't have to babbel me to death!
If you don't want informed feedback, don't post your movies here. Zephlon took his own time to give you some constructive criticism (not all of which was negative, which you'd see if you actually read it) and try to help you improve. Your response should be to thank him.

And also, about swearing in movies in general– I haven't taken the time to watch this one– it can be very effective in serious movies if used right. Movies like Superbad sometimes successfully overuse swearing, but that's only because they're intended to be comedic and somewhat ridiculous.
Posted: Sat, 23rd Aug 2008, 2:03am

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Fill

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FXhomer11107 wrote:

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
YEAH CUZ CUSSING IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.

Like Zephlon said, you had some nice angles, and you have a lot of potential with pacing and cinematography. The acting was mediocre, but I don't really expect someone of your age to posses a top notch actor, nor do I expect actors of your age to swear so much. Yes, you have freedom of speech, and yes, you're allowed to say those words as you please-- I certainly can't stop you-- but there is a line, and when you pass that line, you work starts to become less and less interesting. Keep that in mind.

If you really want to pursue film, you could pull it off. You've got a natural eye for pacing and angles.
Posted: Mon, 25th Aug 2008, 9:03pm

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SilverDragon7

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FXhomer11107 wrote:

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
Can anyone explain to me how Superbad comes into this? Superbad isn't The Dead Deal.
Posted: Mon, 25th Aug 2008, 11:58pm

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FXhomer23319

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Hey guys:
Really nice use of a variety of shots/angles that keep it moving forward visually. If you're going to continue writing, producing and directing, you are, however,going to have to reconcile yourself to constructive crticism. Remember that the crtics aren't criticizing YOU, they're criticizing the work. These two are not one and the same. I have no criticism but will only offer the advice that you should continue to pump out storylines on video simply because you demonstrate lots of great potential in this area. As far as language is concerned, I'm not in agreement with several of the other commentators. Trust me, if someone was chasing me with a gun, I'd be cussing all over the place.
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 12:48am

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Bolbi

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howd this get passed the censors?! come on admin, can you not keep this stuff out?
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 12:52am

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Penguin

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FXhome movies aren't censored. They get ratings, and you can choose to watch them or not based on the ratings.
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 2:19am

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Bolbi

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i thought that they previewed the movies or something.... guess not
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 10:50am

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RodyPolis

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Bolbi wrote:

i thought that they previewed the movies or something.... guess not
Yeah, I think they do-that's why it takes so long to be on the website
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 2:37pm

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Simon K Jones

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Bolbi wrote:

howd this get passed the censors?! come on admin, can you not keep this stuff out?
What do you mean by 'this stuff'?

In terms of content, there's nothing here that is particularly unsuitable. For the violence and swearing we gave it a '15' cert, to make sure parents would know not to let their young kids watch.

The only things we actively don't put in the cinema are:

- Anything illegal
- Pornography (this is NOT the same as nudity, which in some cases might be fine)
- Random YouTube crap that clearly has had zero thought or effort(this does NOT include genuine effects/filmmaking tests. It also does not include something that is of poor quality and is on YouTube, but which nevertheless has had effort put into)

FXhomer11107 wrote:

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
Yes, it is your movie and, yes, you can create whatever content you want in it. By the same token, this is a public website and people can say what they like about your movie. If you don't like that, then don't put your movie up in a public space. Simple as that.

If, however, you would like to improve as a filmmaker and receive some useful feedback, this is a good place to come. If you read Zephlon's post more carefully you'll see that there's positive and negative in there, and some tips on how to improve.

Also, did anybody else find it amusing how Zephlon disliked the swearing so much, but didn't find it at all concerning that two kids were running around with guns shooting each other? razz
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 2:54pm

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Leon215

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FXhomer11107 wrote:

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
1. I thought that your film was O.k as a whole. It had a couple of nice camera shots.
2. I'm going to ask that you would just try to listen to people you who have been doing this for years.
3. If you sometimes just listen to the things we tell you than you just might become a way better film maker but if you stay to thinking that your always right and all that crap, than your not going to grow as a filmmaker.
4. Language: The type of words that you said on this movie was not coool at all. Just because you think that you can say something doesn't mean you should. When you spoke the type of lanauge that you spoke on your movie it really made you seem like you wanted to be an "Adult". People mostly curse because they're mad about something. You're acting just told us that you were not mad, it just told us you wanted to curse just for the heck of it. Which is not a good thing. To tell you the truth it made you look a little weird on camera saying all of those words at your age.
5. Just try to somtimes listen to people who know what there talking about.
6. LISTENING TO PEOPLE WILL MAKE YOU A BETTER FILM MAKER!!!!!
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 4:19pm

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Coureur de Bois

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FXhomer11107 wrote:

IT'S MY MOVIE, I'LL CREATE WHATEVER CONTENT I WANT IN IT!! Take Superbad for an example 99.9% of the time there's cursing, but that's a popular movie, GET OVER IT!
I sure wouldn't want to mess with you in real life.

The movie was ok. I wouldn't worry too much about those who criticize the foul language. They're just sensitive individuals, not tough guys like you and me.
Posted: Tue, 26th Aug 2008, 7:52pm

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Penguin

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Bolbi wrote:

i thought that they previewed the movies or something.... guess not
Yeah, they preview them, to make sure that they aren't actually porn or anything and to give them a rating. But hardly anything would actually get rejected from the cinema...you just have to decide based on the ratings what ones you do/don't want to watch.
Posted: Sat, 30th Aug 2008, 12:11am

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Spike 2006

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where has the guy who posted this film gone? there was one comment by him then he just vanished - the video has reportedly been broken, so i can't watch it...
Interesting comments though...
Joe Swinn
www.gungurru.com