Posted: Wed, 21st Oct 2009, 2:37pm
Post 1 of 17
|This is a Clint Eastwood inspired short film. In the style of a spaghetti western, the "Good Guy" (Austin Dalziel) has an epic showdown with a wanted man, Pablo Juiez (Ankit Engineer). Music: "Nasty Letter" By Otis Taylor Performed by Otis Taylor "Ten Million Slaves" By Otis Taylor Performed by Otis Taylor (All Rights Reserved To The Artist)|
Copyright Atomic Studios 06-09
This film is probably my best work yet. It took me at least 2 days to complete and post on Youtube. I havn't entered it in any film festivals yet, but I'm thinking I should try and get honest feedback first, before I go out of my way just to be shut-down at a festival. Also, there is at least 8 "Easter-Eggs" in the film. So far nobody has found them all. Sometime soon I'll be creating a Commentary for the film highlighting how it was made and the struggles we faced.
So please enjoy!
Posted: Wed, 21st Oct 2009, 3:04pm
Post 2 of 17
What's good here is the selection of shots. You have some closeups, some normals and some wide shots. Unfortunately, that's pretty much the only thing that works in this.
First of all, a showdown is only interesting to watch when you're familiar with the characters, have witnessed their stories over a certain time and when you're actually interested in seeing what happens. So if you just take random guys the audience has never seen before and ultimately, doesn't care about, a showdown doesn't work emotionally.
This spagethi western drawn out thing completely relies on those exact emotions. So it completely falls apart here leaving your film utterly way too long, mundane and, apologies, extremely boring.
This also is no "film", as it tells nothing at all. The mundane background I know of the characters is from the text. The film shows me nothing but long shots of strangers acting tough.
So I doubt this would be anything to submit to film festivals. Honestly, save the money, write a proper screenplay and invest it into getting that one done.
Posted: Wed, 21st Oct 2009, 3:29pm
Post 3 of 17
Downloading/loading the film now.....
Also, you may run into trouble with that studio name.
Posted: Thu, 22nd Oct 2009, 2:52am
Post 4 of 17
Hey thanks for the feedback and the honesty so far!
Ok, so yeah i probably over-simplified the catagory as a "Film" and it is a little longer than it should be. But to correct myself, i agree its more of an experimental/short/callaboration thing, and not an actual "film". And as for the studio name.... well its temporary-Lolz. And since it wasnt taken on youtube i figured "why not.
But to keep things simple and considering i won't get in trouble for being 1 out of 10,000 "Atomic Studios", i just left things the way they were.
I am working on some screenplays with a beginning, middle, end, conflict, resolution , etc etc....but this "film" was just a spur-of-the-moment kinda work. And i just wanted to test if i can Direct a short with me and my friends with a brand new camera, new editing equipment, and no script.
And as for the looking "tough".... i figured there'd be no harm in looking bad-ass lolz.
So thanks and keep up the feedback!
Posted: Thu, 22nd Oct 2009, 7:14am
Post 5 of 17
I'm with Ben: Good luck with the name, it might run you into some trouble.
Posted: Thu, 22nd Oct 2009, 5:18pm
Post 6 of 17
To tell the truth I liked it the overall feel of the film. You overdid the showdown aspect, like someone said, there is no story behind the characters therefore the fight isn't as big as it was made out to be. That's what made star wars episode III the final showdown so good. Since the duel between obiwan and anakin had been lead up to the entire movie, they got away with some circling etc. As for the effects, they wre great, you got away with overdoing the smoke and impacts. You could have used a hand grenade explosion or a gas tank impact to increase the effect. www.detonationfilms.com
has some great FREE explosion footage you could use. The music was ok, it worked, i'll say that. You also did a good job not using the popular presets everyone else used, like optics or smoke or muzzle flashes. One aspect you lacked was the weapons sounds, you'll need those if you submit it to a contest (I have a bunch if you need e'm ). I think the ending would have been better if the unknown good guy had just blasted the "bad guy" from far away. The surrender just didn't fit the "battle to the death" theme of the movie. You could have made the wound on the good guy at the end, at least I didn't see it. The constant clip changing was a bit of a drag too. Still a great movie, defiantly my top 10.
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 2:25am
Post 7 of 17
F#cking A man, that was a cool as shit movie. i love Western style movies and that was defintly a good one. i also thought the music you used was great, gave it a real Western feel. i really like it.
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 11:22am
Post 8 of 17
Not to bad, a little long in the begining. Most of the shots look good as did the effects. Keep working at it.
PS. The name Atomic Studio is a dime a dozen, so I don't think you have anything to worry about.http://www.atomicstudios.com/http://www.atomicstud.com/http://www.atomicstudios.net/
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 12:01pm
Post 9 of 17
where did you get the music?
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 5:08pm
Post 10 of 17
I agree with Solthar on this.
I'm not saying it was bad but he pointed out pretty much all of the good aspects and also everything that was put off-ish about this... "movie"?
I really, really liked the music though but I wouldn't have minded one bit if there had been a banjo in there somewhere.
Listen... I'm not poking fun at you or your actor but I really have to ask and I hope you're not offended as this is not meant to be offensive.
But what the hell is up with the good guys hair style? It looks like a cross between the old Gatchaman cartoon and something the sixties barfed up and gave to the seventies because it was embarrassed by it. It's about as bad as a guy shaving his eyebrows or my fat 300 pound sister wearing cloths that would make a 115 pound girl feel awkward. See what I'm saying? Guys shaving their eyebrows and the way my sister dresses is and looks pretty stupid. and when I see something silly... I'm gonna tell the person that's being silly that they indeed are being silly. For instance, my friend Courtney got a hair cut but the hair dresser cut it crooked... very crooked, I asked the hair dresser why she cut it crooked and she said that's how it's supposed to be, it's in style. I said... maybe it is in style but that's your opinion and my friend didn't pay you for your opinion, she paid you to cut her hair straight. Sorry about the rant but here's another one for you.
I'm assuming that it's very trendy with young kids because every time I go somewhere... All I see are clones. All the kids dress the same way and have the same haircut as your actor. Sorry... kids like that really urk me but that haircut is what kept me from believing the whole "tough guy" thing that you were going for so it made me hope that the bad guy would win. Not only do I wish the bad guy had won... I wish the bad guy could have scalped the good guy... Native American style. Just kidding.
Anyway, I think that if you added a beginning and a middle to this movie... It might make an interesting flick and I would definitely watch it, but only if the good guy gets a hair cut that's not silly looking and crooked. You know what? It looked like a seventies comb over. Is that what it is? Are the seventies making a comeback? If that's what you youngsters are trying to do... trust me... leave the seventies where they are.
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 6:57pm
Post 11 of 17
HAHAHAHAH! Me and Ankit looked at Spydurhank's comment and died laughing! I thought that was really funny (Honestly) and don't worry, i did get a haircut that afternoon and Ankit shaved his unibrow. But like i said before, it was spur of the moment so there really was no preperation for it other than the costumes.
(Also, both my parents are hairdressers soo that night they said im getting a haircut. So i did, and its much better now.)
The music was from the "Public Enemies" Soundtrack. Its one of those songs that aren't under Youtube's copyright thing, so if your putting it on there, dont worry about it. Unless they change it.
Posted: Fri, 23rd Oct 2009, 7:28pm
Post 12 of 17
Hi, I have to be honest and say that Showdown is almost intolerably boring and I only managed to watch it all because of a perverse desire to see it through.
It's about 7 minutes too long, the credits are so aggrandised that they are almost pathetic, for example I assume you didn't actually have 3 cameras, so why have you put cameras a, b, and c? It looks silly.
A lot of it is blindingly, detail smashingly over exposed, which makes it look amateurish and is unpleasant to watch.
The editing and pace is horribly laboured and awkward, none of the shots are well enough composed or filmed to linger on for anywhere near the length of time that you have.
Also, little things stand out that make it look sloppy, like smoke from one of the gunshots which overlaps the black bar at the top of the screen and the hand that waves up past the camera when the 2 characters are circling each other.
I'm aware that I probably sound massively harsh, and I don't want to crush your work, but this, for me, really does not work.
Posted: Sat, 24th Oct 2009, 12:30am
Post 13 of 17
Posted: Wed, 28th Oct 2009, 9:51pm
Post 14 of 17
If you want to enter a film competition, www.withoutabox.com
has heaps of competitions from around the world. ive entered some of my films in ones on withoutabox.
Posted: Tue, 17th Nov 2009, 10:26pm
Post 15 of 17
I'm sorry guys but I couldn't watch the entire movie. There are so many things wrong. The beginning was basically you and your buddy trying to look cool for way too long. I almost stopped watching it when I started saying to myself, "Are they going to do something soon?"
Also, I think you could have at least found a better location. You were in the middle of a neighborhood. Seriously? And your characters looked completely out of place and out of time. It was really boring. Sorry but you need A LOT! of practice making films before you actually enter in to any type of competition.
Posted: Sun, 22nd Nov 2009, 12:31am
Post 16 of 17
I looked at the studio name and started watching without checking who *actually* made it. Which wasn't very clever, because 2 seconds in I knew this wasn't what I thought it was.
Anyways, it's terrible, but then again, everyone starts somewhere. I suggest reading Sollthars filmmaking guide.
Posted: Sun, 22nd Nov 2009, 1:02am
Post 17 of 17