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Saber Conflict from "escape"

Posted: Thu, 28th Aug 2003, 9:30am

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Unbreakable

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This is the climax of my film called "escape". It is 35 minutes long, and I hope to have the whole film online soon. Enjoy.
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Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 12:20am

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MATT PUGH

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Are you serious? I have been trying to be nice lately about these films. But this is an example of just posting something just to see yourself on the internet. This movie was filled with poor use of SOUND EFFECT, SPECIAL EFFECTS and editing. Also you have utterly put the Matrix Reloaded music, "CHATEU" to horrible use, I think you have destroyed the music even more than Matrix Rejected did. Here is some advice on the constructive side. Learn to edit music to go with the action, work a little harder on the sabers and most importantly the sound FX and lastly give it an ending as opposed to just making it STOP.

Can't wait to see your next flick!


PEACE OUT
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 12:55am

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AndrewtheActorMan

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I would have to agree with MATT on this one! The sabers, i have to admit, were horrible. It looked like u took care it them, but not enough care. It takes paetience to do good effects. And as for the suits, that made me shake my head. As for the music, i wasnt fond of it either. Also, what is the story about?!! I know this wasnt a entire movie, but still, give us sum story details in ur discription. I thought, "Ok, some guys in suits and tshirts, in front of blockbuster....blockbuster having a daredevil sign on it....wahoo. " I noticed the daredevil sign when i was bored of ur clip. I am sorry if i sound harsh, but just trying to be helpful. biggrin

Any way, good luck on ur next flick! or the rest of this movie...touch up ur sabers and muzzle flashes...and of course...YOUR SOUND FX!!! At the end a gun fired and then 2 seconds later the sound was there.....

Good luck! biggrin
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 1:35am

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EddieOue5

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I applaud your efforts, but challenge you to challenge your creative potential. Good points- Kudos on putting together a sequence, you tried to create some angled shots, good attempt. Your limited dialogue, suggested you wanted to tell a story visually, next sequence, no matter how small, focus on telling the story, with the camera. Even if the bad guy is just fighting, same rules apply to telling a story. Premise, Pinch, Conflict, resolution.

Visually, it would go something like this:

Premise: Hero must fight his way thru the parking lot to save the world.
Pinch: villain blocks hero's path, pulls out saber and executes super special fight move
Conflict: Must counter special move, although he is hurt and must reach his special weapon (hero pokes saber thru concrete)

Resolution: Hero reaches his desitnation and saves world, girl or item!

Of course, this must be told visually, even if only just a sequence or short snipet of the overall story. There must be a backstory to the action! Otherwise it's a waste of time to the viewer. It may seem great fun, but if you want to be a great story teller/filmmaker then push yourself!

Take your time with your action and please if the scene doesnt call for smiling, then cut it in post...the audience won't miss it! Finally, for your music, less is better and try to match the action with the music...most editing programs allow you see the beat wave forms, at best, watch for rises and breaks in the music to match sequences, it's a little awkward at first, but for Petesake's man try!!!

Good Effort and continue too shoot, remember this is an amatuer format, but you can strive to rise above it! Have fun, keep ya head up and I will see you at the Cinema!!!!

One Love!!!! Boo-Yaaaa Babyyyy! and I'm gone! Roooo!!!! Que Psi!!!!
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 2:44am

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Unbreakable

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Wow, everything else I posted on this site was applauded to no end, and I put no time or effort into those. This is what took forever to make!


And, I would like to point out, this is only PART OF A SCENE from PART OF A MOVIE. There is no story in this scene! Just fighting! What do you mean the suits looked bad?


Can you expand upon why the sound effects were bad please?

The sabers I have seen in some other videos have been far worse, yet they have not had nearly enough hatred lavished upon them.



Well, what can I say. Maybe I should show you guys the whole 35 minute video that has a good story, or maybe not, for fear of what you will say about it!
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 3:04am

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Aculag

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I haven't watched the film yet because I'm using a 56k right now, but I do have a question. Why is it that you posted the climax of your movie on here, when you have the full thing in the works and almost ready to release? Why not just wait and release the whole thing? Why not a trailer, instead of the climax?
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 4:00am

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MATT PUGH

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Aculag it's like i said. they put this on the site becuase they were excited to see themselves on the internet, and could hardley contain themselves long enough to put the full film on here.

To UNBREAKABLE: if your full film is just an extended version of this then you can just forget even trying to get better reviews than what you have previously recieved.


PEACE OUT
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 5:17am

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Aculag

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Maybe...
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 6:38am

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Unbreakable

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I just think the sabers I had are a lot better than some of the crap on this site. And no one complains about that crap, so why such a problem now?
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 9:17am

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Rawree

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Rating: +1

Actually quite a few people complain about 'that crap'. I'm sure that this isn't MATT picking on you, he is making comments about your movie which may help you improve and at the same time giving his opinion. Anyway it wasn't all negative, EddieOue5 said how much he likes it.

Finally, if you're going to post a movie on the internet then you have to expect comments from people who don't like your movie but that will help you work out what to change next time.

I hope to see 'Escape' soon.

Rawree
p.s just be glad you didn't make a terminator fanfilm or you would have been found floating downriver somewhere far away.
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 2:37pm

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zazouzanzi

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hi this is zaz

i have seen this movie and i must agree with them. I found nothing good in this one.
The fight is bad, the sounds are bad, the video assembly is poor, no creativity in camera angles. errr... nothing makes me want to see more.

I'm sure you can do better. But maybe everyone becomes elitiste and want to see better movies and better movies and then the best ! (wich is mine and coming soon smilesmilesmilesmilesmile

zaz
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 2:45pm

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AndrewtheActorMan

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this may sound rude and get deleted, and give me a bad rating but i dont care. this movie was more like "ESCAPE FROM SABER CONFLICT" tard crazy tard ...good luck on the rest of the movie and your others....
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 5:08pm

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TMM

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This ending has very good ideas, like the stabbing through the wall and the close up camera angles had potential...

One problem is the actor's don't seem to put ANY effort into the fighting, they seemd really lazy and not very aggressive enough for my liking...

The effects weren't added very well, for example, the ligthsabre blades change sized, and sometimes tapered out to almost a point, maybe adding a few extra effects (i personally like a lense flare or alamdv lightbulb near the hilt of the saber) i also thought it would be kewl for sparks to fly out of the wall when the saber goes through it, and mayeb adding some sort of glow, as if the wall was really hot, that could stick there through the footage confused

Also when u DID use sound effects, they were badly timed, and made the action seem very fake...

Had some kewl ideas, just not made as well as they could have been, good effort tho...

TMM
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 6:04pm

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anonymous

The "climax" of the movie? This is more of the anticlimax. Sorry to burst your bubble.
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 7:41pm

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CX3

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Yea man, the fighting was incredibly weak. No effort at all... And i think at the end when you throw the saber, i thought that clip was too long, it seemed to me like it took forever to stab the guy in the back. Thats all.
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 7:52pm

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Unbreakable

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You guys are right about the fighting. This girl I was fighting didn't really even know how to hold the friggin saber! So, it made it hard for me in turn. You're right though, we were lazy. I guess it was because it was 3 am and we had been filming for 7 hours prior.

And just so you know, me throwing the saber at the end isn't supposed to be incredibly realistic, more like a gag.



Honestly guys, the rest of the movie is good. It has no effects though, and not much of a reason for me to submit it here when all I want critique is the effects work.
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 8:48pm

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Aculag

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A Star Wars movie with no effects? Wierd.
Posted: Fri, 29th Aug 2003, 9:27pm

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Unbreakable

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This action scene is longer, and is about teh character using ideas from different movie to fight each other. That is why they are picking up the DVD cases and basically taking weapons out of them from different movies.

No, it is not just some fanboy delight me and my friends made to see ourselves on the internet.
Posted: Sun, 31st Aug 2003, 8:51am

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anonymous

ok this movie was clearly done for fun not amazment

give them some credit I am sure they put alot of time just into the effecte let alone trying to sync it all I think it a decent movie had more plot then some submissions ive seen

good Job its not perfect buts thats not what you were aiming for. smile
Posted: Sun, 31st Aug 2003, 9:07pm

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Unbreakable

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Well guys, sorry. I should've explained myself. Contrary to every other fanboy delight out there, this film has very, very little focus given to these light sabers.


I'll set the scene for you guys:

The character I play (Norman) is pursuing two agents from a fake company that have a surveillance tape he needs to clear his name. This security camera tape is of the meeting that the three of them had, which set Norman up to commit a crime. So, the agents get the tape and realize that there is only one place you can go to to return an unwanted tape.... Blockbuster.

While at Blockbuster, they find that the return slot is jammed previously returned rentals and they cant put the security tape in the slot. All the rentals pour onto the floor and Norman comes walking in shooting at the both of them. Both sides continue the fight, however, they choose their weapons from nearby rental cases. Each weapon is from the movie written on the rental case.

So, they are basically fighting with weapons from famous movies, Star Wars being one of them. So, in essence, I was merely using the light sabers to illustrate a point, not to act out my fanboy fantasies.
Posted: Mon, 1st Sep 2003, 2:47am

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Namcoking

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2 things I hate to see in a Star Wars Fanfilm

1)Kids wanting to play lightsaber

2)Film shot in the woods.

Kudos to you for not filming in a forest.
Posted: Mon, 1st Sep 2003, 3:00am

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Kyeju

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Your sabers dont move fluidly like they should. And there is no energy in your fights. And sometimes your sound was late or too early. BUT I did like those sparks when the dude was shooting at you. Your lightsaber ripoff of "Clipper Cam" from jackass was kinda crappy.

Eh 3 for those sparks and the fact that your agents actually had SUITS.
Posted: Tue, 2nd Sep 2003, 5:24pm

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adamlightandmagic

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The camera work was not great, though not too bad.
The acting was middle of the road.
The fighting (if you can call it that!) was non-existent. The only saving of it would've been the "through the concrete" hit. But that was poorly made as others have pointed out ideas that could've made it better. sleep

Your comments about the girl's fighting were uncalled for. I never blame the person opposite me. If they're not doing things the way you want, change that. Not impossible to do. It is your film after-all...
Also your sabers were really bad. I know there have been worse, but your assumption was wrong as yours join that bunch. hugegrin

To be honest, I thought it was another test scene. It didn't look like an idea that had been thought about a whole lot. I think that's why a lot of folk fall down in their films, because they don't plan enough. Improv and basic ideas don't always work with this kind of stuff.

Post the full film in the forum as a link rather than posting on the cinema if you want. Either that, or replace this one with the full version. Shame is, I liked your idea and you showed the finale. Not much of a finale like something else said.

Sorry dude. neutral
Adam.
Posted: Tue, 2nd Sep 2003, 10:15pm

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Unbreakable

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Look, I'm no saber fighter either, I admit my fighting was bad. But she could not hold the dang thing, and it is IMPOSSIBLE for me to fight against someone and have it look good if they have no clue what they are doing.

Even if I was Ray Park and I was fighting her, it would be lackluster.


Though yes, the fighting is bad, it was supposed to be more of a sight gag in a much larger film. Problem is, the film is so long I can't put it online. And even if I did, the quality would be unbearable.
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 12:26am

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MATT PUGH

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tsk tsk. Putting the bad results of this fight soley on you friend?? That's not wut friends are supposed to do. If she could see what you were writing about her, I doubt she'd go on a date with you ever again. Much less do a movie.


PEACE OUT
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 1:08am

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Aculag

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How come you didn't teach her how to do it before you filmed it? Or did you just not want to tell a girl what to do?
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 4:00am

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Unbreakable

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Some people just can't learn. They just aren't built to play with light sabers, hehe.

Seriously though, she just can't fight fast. Maybe its reflexes.


And, you cannot "teach" someone how to use a ligthsaber. I mean, come on, you just hold it and swing! I'm not that good, obviously, but atleast I can swing it.
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 4:15am

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adamlightandmagic

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Oh dear, what have I started? confused Ah well, you're digging your own grave.

Some people just can't learn.
Hole's gettin' bigger...

you cannot "teach" someone how to use a ligthsaber.
Keep on diggin'! cool

Either you have a funny way of working and that means people don't get what you're asking of them, or you didn't really think about this scene much. Hmm..?

Adam.
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 7:46am

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Aculag

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Do you think Ewan McGregor just picked up his prop saber and started swinging it around for The Phantom Menace? Nooo.... He was taught fighting methods and they choreographed the fights. That's like, the most important part of doing a fight scene. The Choreography. So if you think you can just swing sticks around and put a glow on them and it'll make a good lightsaber fight you're wrong. Go out and buy a book on fighting techniques, or take a few weapons classes. The point is, you CAN teach how to use a lightsaber, and, EVERYONE can learn, it just depends on who's teaching them. I guess you're not a very good teacher.
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 11:58am

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nicmar

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HAHAHA!
I really must say that after reading the previous reviews on this one I had the lowest expectations on this film whatsoever.. I thought it was gonna be total crap and waste of time (2 minutes)..

Actually I think it was pretty cool.. not like the best scene I've ever seen, but the lightsabres movements were fluid, except for some weird cutoff's at the middle of the girls sabre.. and the "burning hole in agents back" in the end..

I can't believe people write such horrible reviews.. and you unbreakable, blaming this it on the girl "don't know how to hold the sabre" or whatever you said.. that was really weak! She was ok!

haha i like the way she looks totally surprised in the beginning..


To all you "reviewers" out there.. give some constructive critisism instead of this total CRAP..

I'm releasing my movie soon, and I'm sure all of you have a lot of bad things to say about it.. keep it inside and tell us how we could make things better..

Final on this, I think it was cool and comical how the sabre we're flying after the dude.. was it supposed to be some kind of slomo effect? maybe too long though.. biggrin

One more thing.. what about the music? In what ways did he make the music worse than it was? I barely noticed the music, and the soundfx was ok.. smile

Good luck on the full film.. mine is also about 35 minutes long.. interesting..

PS: Make sure the girl gets my phone number.. just kiddin wink
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 10:03pm

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Unbreakable

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I am sorry guys, really. It was wrong of me to blame anything on this girl, and I too have not any special fighting ability. I should've explained the subtext of the scene, in which it fits a lot more appropriately. You need to know this is not a fan film, but merely a sight gag in a movie I think is well made.



And Nicmar, you won't have any luck with this girl because shes mine! I've been working on her for some time now, and I won't let you screw it up.


I just wanted to make it clear earlier, that there are some people who will never be able to weild a lightsaber at very fast speeds. Of course once someone like Ewan McGregor goes through training that is possible, but I am sure that he is slightly more agile than this girl. Though she is better looking.
Posted: Wed, 3rd Sep 2003, 11:10pm

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Aculag

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Unbreakable wrote:

And Nicmar, you won't have any luck with this girl because shes mine! I've been working on her for some time now, and I won't let you screw it up.
Jesus, man. You realize you're telling off a guy on an internet message board right? I hope that was just a joke, otherwise, you're really sad.

And why would you say Ewan McGregor is more agile than your lady friend? Is she a total sloth or something?

By this time, I'm just messing with you, so don't take offence by anything I say. Although, I'd keep this forum away from your girl, because she probably would take offence to some stuff you've said. wink
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 3:48am

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Unbreakable

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Of course I'm not serious!


I'm utterly disgusted... ugh.
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 4:47am

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Aculag

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Don't cry.
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 5:33am

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Magic_man12

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Hey

a couple things to say

Editing - really off - random cuts to shots that dont fit in

camera always shaking.....less of that


fighting needs to be faster and better coorographed

sabers need to look better somehow - they are very box like

no real complaints about the music

in the middle of the fight after the girl dies- thers no hum for the blue saber anymore

and you can hear the wood from the double saber hitting the floor - take that out\

sound becomes non-existant once she dies then picks up after a bit


good luck with stuff

-MAGIC
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 6:47am

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nicmar

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Haha.. i'm sure you live in the US so you can work it best you like with this girl... i'm in Sweden, Europe.. wink

You could have at least said thank you to my positive critisism.. hehe.. cause there are not many of that kind in here.. biggrin

Welcome to Sweden, the land of blonde chicks wink

Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 7:02am

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Unbreakable

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You live in Sweden, then why hit on this girl? lucky....

No, dude, totally thank you for the comments as they actually helped some.

Same thing Magic_man12, those are the types of comments I need more of.


The thing is, I wasn't holding the camera, and I need to teach this guy who was holding it not to make it so bumpy. It's common sense really, but some people aren't too great at holding cameras (much like light sabers).
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 9:21am

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nicmar

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A tip is get two cameras and two tripods... that way you get two angles of the same sequence, great for editing!

And if you need camera movements, get some kind of dolly.. we were gonna make one but never got the time.. so for our next movie.. we're gonna do something smile
Posted: Thu, 4th Sep 2003, 6:48pm

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adamlightandmagic

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If you can't tell what to change from what people have been writing here, then you've been using selective reading of these posts. unsure To be honest, I'm done with this film. The fact that it looks and sounds the way it does, makes me want to not bother to help. eek That said, I agree that you need more practice on editing of video and audio. As well as actually stopping to think, long and hard about how to do everything you want.

Tighten up your editing by watching and then critique it by taking down notes of things you want to change, e.g. pacing, camera angles, visual effect shots, sound editing, etc. etc.
If you yourself can't see what's wrong with this submitted movie - Seek someone elses opinion. And don't tell me you do it 'just for fun' cause otherwise you wouldn't be asking for ways to make it better. That's a little harsh of me... redface But really try and plan what you're going to do next time. THEN.. make sure you know how you want things to look. If your ideas and enthusiasm are low, so too, your films will be! sad

I really hope there's something in my post that you can take and apply to your next feature. Just make sure that it really excites you. If this one did...find another hobby. hugegrin

Regards,
Adam.

Last edited Sat, 6th Sep 2003, 3:32pm; edited 1 times in total.

Posted: Fri, 5th Sep 2003, 6:36am

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nicmar

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hehe.. well.. you are kinda harsh...

And you are weird of saying that we can't do this for fun... we make a movie right now for fun.. and it's really fun.. especially to watch all the bloopers and stuff...

The movie is mainly made for me and my friends.. but of course I'm gonna put it here.. and if you people here like it.. that's a big bonus smile

We're gonna make a DVD with a lot of bonus material... deleted scenes, bloopers.. behind the scenes.. etc.. it'll be a lot of fun.. especially in 20-30 years.. smile

Or maybe this is the start of a career as a movie maker.. wink


And Unbreakable.. don't listen too much on this.. keep making movies.. if not for us here on AlamDV, for yourself and friends..

And hopefully you'll get that chick in the end... I bet you write a script where you kiss the girl in the end, and do it all wrong so you have to retake the scene many times.. hehe..

See U later alligator biggrin
Posted: Fri, 5th Sep 2003, 7:09am

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Aculag

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Well, I should hope someone wouldn't stop making movies, but rather learn to make better ones when they get negative comments...
Posted: Fri, 5th Sep 2003, 7:58am

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nicmar

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Yes, and actually make movies instead of putting up those "lightsabre test" etc movies here.. that's not really useful.. smile

Hehe.. i'm so excited what you're gonna say about our movie.. hehe..
Posted: Fri, 5th Sep 2003, 4:51pm

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adamlightandmagic

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Nicmar, I never said he couldn't do it for fun. I actually said that he has an alterior motive when he asks about how to make it better from users on this forum. Hence it can't 'just be' for fun. A 35min movie idea that seems badly executed? I think time needs to be taken over an idea and with this film I didn't see anything like that. I'd be interested to know exactly what preparations were made. wink

Like I said, I want to help. But since everyone here has said the same things need to be better(ed), what's the point of lying and saying something is good when it's not? I've come across plenty that made sure I knew my first filmic efforts were not great and that really made me search myself for bigger and better ideas. Hopefully, this guy will take the same course, cause it really helped me overcome any shoddiness I used to have.

Aren't we all on the same page..?

Adam.
Posted: Fri, 5th Sep 2003, 11:57pm

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Unbreakable

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You are putting up the assumption that I think this "sequence" is perfect, in my mind. I know it is not and that there is much to fix!

However, I and all who have seen the full film, believe that this sequence is very good within the context of the rest of the film.

You see, our characters aren't supposed to be good at using light sabers. They are just using weapons from different movies that they are finding on the ground outside of blockbuster (it's a long story). So, as a recognition type gag, I don't think the fighting had to be too elaborate. More planned of course, but not more elaborate.


I really do wish you could see the rest of the film though, because it did turn out quite beautifully (so I'm told, I personally think it has a few plot holes and such).



Just don't think that I am only hearing the positive feedback. Trust me, I hear it all, and I'm working hard to implement it in what I do.



Here is the full script of my film:

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=265514
Posted: Sat, 6th Sep 2003, 12:08am

Post 45 of 47

Aculag

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Well, i finally got around to watching this. That part at the end where the saber was thrown made me laugh my ass off. Oh mayon.
Posted: Sat, 6th Sep 2003, 3:30pm

Post 46 of 47

adamlightandmagic

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I looked at that link to the other forum and I was much more impressed by the clip you posted there. The only drawback was the sound editing. Why didn't you put up a trailer with footage like that clip along with your vfx edits here? I think that would've been better received because the editing is better and we can actually see what's going on.

I'd say you missed out there.

You are putting up the assumption that I think this "sequence" is perfect, in my mind. I know it is not and that there is much to fix!
Well, usually people get that impression when a clip is posted here, that it's finished. In some form... I'd never post something I didn't think was complete and as good as I could make it.

Adam.

P.S. Your script needs better formatting! wink biggrin lol
Posted: Sun, 7th Sep 2003, 9:05pm

Post 47 of 47

Unbreakable

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Oh, I posted the script into the forum and it turned out really screwed up.

The original word document is nicely formatted, methinks.


I actually just wanted an opinion of how the effects looked from a technical standpoint. That is the only reason I put the fight up here only. I put the rest of the movie stuff into another forum where I wanted judgement on the rest of the film, not the special effects.